Sadhak
If the actions or behaviour of a devotee irritate or annoy you then it is your own weakness or shortcoming. Even if you cannot accept this, it is important not to use your mind and intellect to judge the behaviour of other devotees. You have no reason or legitimate excuse to ponder upon other’s faults. The only way to refrain from doing this is to pray sincerely and perform séva with mahatmya. The perfect aspirant is one who practices this with conviction and sincerity.
Everyone, be they old or young must make a conscious decision never to participate in criticism or gossip. If you happen to be present where any form of criticism or gossip or negative discourse is taking place, leave immediately. Do not listen to such malicious talk, do not allow it to continue, and under no circumstances should you participate with enthusiasm. If it is inappropriate or impossible to leave then you should certainly make it clear that you disapprove and begin to chant the Swaminarayan mantra.